the beginning of the end

so if this is the end , where has it all begun
if in fact this is the end then whats done is done
where am i now , where am i to be
where is the end that i now for see

the lights dancing in my head has started to fade
the smiles gone , leaving behind a face so sad
what hurts most is the unknown
what life may bring in the next morn

so if this is the beginning , where will it end
where will life go , when will this straight road bend
alas i can no longer pretend
that life will heal , that the heart will mend

so this is hate

so this is hate
so says my closest mate
thats why i wish i could just bash in his head
untill hes just burnt and dead

so this is hate
so says my best mates date
thats why shes going to suffer the same
a cute dead damsel , such a shame

so this is hate
so says the president , the Great
in his late night speach
to the insolent pups that he do teach

so this is love

so this is love
at least thats what the stars are saying above
thats what the sea turtles are whining about
thats why im still so in doubt

so this is love
so says the lonely high flying dove
wish i could give it a good wicked shove
in to the boggy marsh grove

so this is love
and i have run out of words to rhyme with love
so says i , the one whose trying to rhyme
hmm , you know what rhymes with rhyme , its lime

do you really have to be negatively different to be unique

hmm...do you really have to be angry inside to show that you are uniquely different , do you really have to rant about nonsence and be a freak , have a permanent frown or dumb smile on your face , try to be extremely funny when even you dont enjoy being funny and other people find it extremely annoying , try to be absolutely unconcerned about everything and try acting like you dont give an absoloodle f fucking fuck about anything when you really do cause its hip...hmm again ...do you have to shout out ,be angry ,act dumb,cry,laugh as if you were crazy....just to be different,just to get noticed cause you havent got anything in you that anyone would be bothered about to notice in the first place...

Would the love you love be real if

when you see a woman stand up for her rights and raise her voice and if you were in the visinity to witness that episode you say that shes an intolerable bitch who would definitely sleep with anybody of choice (including you) , and then you go home to your wife,mother or sister and say that you love her.

when some female employee gets a promotion you say that she must have slept with at least two third of the senior staff to have gotten there, and when your sister or mother gets a promotion at her job its....

when your close friends divorced mother is sexy as hell and you have unconventional thoughts about her ,and then you go home and say to your mother that you love her very much.

these situations i have encountered in the past two days...these are just questions ...i dont know the answers

How novels shape our lifes

The first novel i really identified myself is The Otsiders ,which i got on my 13th birthday from my family (specially from my dad...love you dad if you are reading this) .Ponyboy Curtis my first real idol, true genious of S.E Hinton. Read it so many times that i cant really tell how many.Someday im gonna give my son the same novel on his thirteenth birtday...

Greasers the toughest bunch of hoodlums on this side of the green line...tough in every sence of the word...cool guys that stick with each other through everything....well im not gonna go in to the stuff too much cuz it might ruin it for you when and if you ever read it.

Next in line comes Great Expectations by Charles Dickens...but well thats for another day

holding my frustrations within

went out with my bloody file wishing that i was anywhere but here (mostly home with my wife) ...on the way met one of my colleagues smiled and said something pleasant...never registering that i had said anything at all...all the while wanting to just bash his head in with my bloody file ...flight landed...went outer still (always wanted to say outer instead of more out or some gibberish whatsoever)...so my flight landed ....wanted to just throw the bloody file on the apron and stomp up and down on it until bits and pieces fell apart....fisted my hands a couple of times and then went and did the flight...found that i still actually enjoyed it...barely